on the tram. where i think.
Monday, May 16, 2005
one race, run it.
However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace. ~Acts 20:24
uncle chee boon shared this today and i've realised that i'm no where near there that. it really did hit me and i'm saddened that it has taken me 18 yrs to realise that. i've always had the habit of looking at backslided or hypocritical christians and giving them the 'not happening' look. but i have to outrightly say that when placed beside these people in front of God.. i'm no different. not one bit! it angered me to know of Christians who turned their cheeks away from God from mon to sat.. but now it angers me even more to realise that if there was a checklist for the hypocritical christian.. i would perfectly fit the bill! materialism, pride, laziness, evil thoughts, trash talking.. you name it. they've been there all along. its just that i have been giving the 'for-goodness-sake-i'm-a-teenager-for-crying-out-loud!!' reason. i'm convicted. but deep deep down.. i know that this is no live-changing revelation that is going to change me overnight. neither am i going to be a holier duane when i wake up tmr morn. but what i do hope is that blogspot.com will remain up and running for as long as God wills it.. so that i can look back at this post when i need a nudge or a kick in the gluteus maximus. so firstly.. i have to change the way i pray and start to REALLY speak to God. no more 'grant me a perfect girlfriend'.. 'give me steve vai's fingers and joe satriani's dexterity'.. 'give me an A for my test tmr'..'i want a perfect body, i want a perfect soul (radiohead)'.. 'strike that kid who punched me'...'grant me a girlfriend NOW'.. no more of that anymore. coz as the verse says it all.. i'm quite a nothing. i'm just gonna be a blank piece of paper and let God write the life story the way he wants it. i'll try at least. and i hope that all this says something to someone. esp to my brothers-in-Christ.
t